Gujjus are famous for a lot of things. Well, I’m going to name the right reasons here- culture, heritage, traditions, food, and tons of more stuff. But when it comes to Gujarati weddings, it’s a different ball game altogether. Well, they are not found anywhere else on the planet, at least not the authentic stuff. Here are the quintessential things which make the Gujarati wedding ala grand and a hilarious joy ride!
Following are 12 Funny Things That Happen In Every Gujju Wedding
1) Jamvani line stage ni line karta laambi hoye
The sole motivation to attend a wedding with super annoying relatives around is the amazing food out there. Ardha thi vadhare loko to jamvaa jaavey. Why not yaar! Weddings always mean free yummy food and kickass back drops for selfies.
2) Two bed par 40 loko
Weddings are all about cramping people into the space that is available. Given the volumes of people that turn up on every Gujju wedding, adjust karvu pade yaar ! Infact this is the best part and no guest ever minds it.
3) Aaakhi raat ni panchat
Vaato na vada karya vagar toh lagan puranaathaye. The sole motive of landing up for the wedding is the collective gossip resource that each of our kaakis and maasis have. Even if there is ample amount of work to be done, panchaat karva toh time mali j jaye !
4) Aada fatela fua aka that one demanding relative!
They just need something illogical to start an argument so that their presence is felt in the wedding. Su majaa avti hase su khabar. Then the entire focus shifts from the bride and the groom to manaaofying that relative (who is most of the times a fuaji)
5) Chaanlo!
Even if the wedding invitation says that no gifts will be accepted, in cash or kind. There will always be a kaaka sitting on a table noting down the “ chaanlo” Also not to forget the calculation of how much did they receive from the host family. Bau ganatri baapa!
6) Traumatic cousin bragging session
This has to happen post every dinner. Shanti thi badha majak masti karta hase this one cousin from USA will turn up and start bragging and slowly the entire group will sneak on the terrace leaving the bragging cousin with one younger sibling. Karo majja havey!
7) Naagin dance waala kaka
This the forte of atleast one kaaka or dada. Aam dance nai kare but the moment you force this person their hands will go up their head and somehow naagin ni aatma aavi j jaye! They are just awesome to be an audience to.
8) Of course hearing “have taaro vaaro che”
If you belong to the immediate family of the bride or the groom then god bless you! Out of the 500 people attending the wedding almost 80 percent will greet you with “ have beta taro vaaro che, shodhva laago ! ” and you will have just the fake smile reacton to it.
9) The jag mag family
Accept it or not there is always this one family at every Gujju wedding who just puts up all the glitter that is left in the world on their bodies.
10) Page laago even to the dogs!
Gujju weddings are a page laago spree. Pro tip: keep iodex handy because page toh laagvu j padse ! You may have never seen that relative nor will you see but you have to do shashtaang naman to him just because your mommy gave you a cold stare.
11) The informal rishta introdutions
If you find your long distance relative calling up their children saying ‘taara jetlo/jetli che, ek vaar malso ne tame pachi vandho nai aavey!’ that is your time to run. Like really RUN! Or suffer a conversation with the bunny teethed son or daughter of theirs.
12) The “maari lipstick khovaai gayi” screams
With so much of hustle and bustle around of course things will get misplaced. So be ready to spend most of the time in finding out about the lost stuff. Without such roller coasters the marriage is not complete.
Just so you don’t miss out on these epic encounters, Gujju na lagan ma jalul jalul thi aavjo!
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